Save international rugby, remove the All Blacks
The All Blacks dominate the Rugby Championship like milk dominates Weetbix, reducing proud rugby nations full of fresh crispy hope at the start of the season to a grey, sludgy mess by the conclusion.
We've won 15 titles, while traditional rivals Australia and South Africa have a measly four and three respectively. Argentina, shoehorned in in 2012, have none and haven't really gone close.
Every Rugby Championship team has a fatal flaw - South Africa's internal politics means they're all over the place year to year, the Aussies are on a prolonged downswing they seem to have no idea how to get out of, while Argentina for all their brawn and heart are yet to make the breakthrough to consistency. The All Blacks are... too good?
The competition's flaw is the sameness - everyone's played everyone everywhere a million times, new innovations (erm, mainly more games and more teams) are seemingly solely for broadcasters' benefit, haven't worked, and geography means there's no away fans, the winning formula that brings Europe's six nations to life.
Australian coach Michael Cheika is the most interesting thing about the competition, bouncing off the walls of his little coaches' box like a gorilla in the meerkats enclosure. If his players showed that fire, Saturday night's Bledisloe test will be a cracking watch.
Preview attempts range from gamely talking up the un-talk-up-able (Why this Bledisloe Cup Test is the All Blacks biggest assignment since winning the last World Cup) to straight out hoping for an All Black loss (The Rugby Championship – and New Zealand – needs an All Blacks loss).
I'm aware that moaning about winning is unbecoming in the extreme. As New Zealanders we're very very proud of what the national team has worked hard to achieve over a long period. But as rugby fans, we just want to see some close games.
International rugby would be a competitive, engaging and compelling international sport if you, erm, took us out. Maybe World Rugby's challenge is to grow the game from the bottom, but also reduce it by one at the top.
Thanks for reading - Richard
The week's best NZ sport writing
Five items on Gary Stead's to-do list - this week's unveiling received universal approval, thanks to a clear, well explained plan that everyone can understand. Has a New Zealand coach ever taken the role with things in such good shape? [Cricinfo]
NZ Netball are leaving no stone unturned, including some that have been turned over quite a few times, to turn things around. Suzanne McFadden talks to Casey Kopua and Laura Langman [Newsroom]
Who were the greatest Super Rugby team ever? Deep dive statto nerd-out, with a shocking outcome [NZ Herald]
The Black Ferns, who play a double header with the All Blacks in Sydney, take a wee girl under their wing at training. Heartwarmer. [stuff.co.nz]
Video nasty
Flashheart - the greatest cameo you'll ever see.
Long read
Are supernerds ruining sport? Stats and unlocking the secret sauce to who's great, who's rubbish and what we should do next have changed the game, but should we just relax and enjoy the spectacle instead? [The Guardian]
Bonus read - The Imran Khans I've known by Osman Samiuddin [Cricket Monthly]
Selected weekend fixtures
So, in the rugby championship it's All Blacks v Australia from Sydney at 9.45pm Saturday night (Black Ferns play Australia at 7.15pm!), while South Africa host Argentina at 3.05am Sunday morning, all on SKY
Arsenal have another tough assignment at Chelsea at 4.30am Sunday, while Spurs have Fulham the same day at 2am, all on BeIN
Bring back the gif
When your co-worker wasn't even born in the 80s.
