LEAKED: Toyota have already drafted All Blacks 'bugger' campaign
Sport Review #322
NEWSDESK: Sport Review can exclusively reveal that new All Black sponsors Toyota have already developed a ‘Bugger’ campaign, should the team fail to win the William Webb Ellis cup in 2027.
“Sure, we put Bugger in the deck,” said an account manager from advertising agency Latrine Fowler WNK who did not wish to be named. “We spent considerable minutes getting to know New Zealand rugby fans, their culture, their dreams and what makes them tick. We also googled ‘Toyota’ and ‘New Zealand’. See you in Cannes!”
Possible tv commercial scenarios include a family of All Blacks fans experiencing challenges making their flight to the quarter final, reaching their seats only to see the team lose 28-5, and saying ‘Bugger!', and a dog in the coaching box looking at a laptop computer and saying ‘Bugger!’.
A Toyota spokesperson confirmed the car company was already looking to work Bugger into lower-level All Black catastrophes throughout the season, from yellow-carded players wearing Bugger vests to Bugger flags for Eden Park fans to wave should the team lose at their impregnable fortress in 2025. Justin Marshall is reportedly open to working Bugger content into his commentary, with big Joey Wheeler on standby to become Bugger Man for the world cup campaign.
Experts are already questioning whether famously humour-free All Black fans would appreciate this level of advertising strategy 5D chess in the aftermath of an All Blacks world cup exit, where traditionally focus is on recrimination and blood letting.
“This could be an ‘Abstain for the Game’-level disaster or maybe people will just be looking at AI-generated community Facebook group dog shit complaints on their iPads during the ad breaks, who knows?”
“Flip it around - the real question is, can the Bugger dog, a favourite of TV1 viewers throughout the nation, withstand being associated with an All Blacks world cup defeat, which is generally brand poison and a space for know it all ex All Blacks and talkback callers to speak,” said AUT marketing lecturer Ohno Pant-Roll.
Thanks for reading - Richard
This week's best NZ sport content
Andrew Voerman how Auckland FC have built a title winning club from the ground up in a year, with some interesting stats on the more experienced players [Stuff]
Olivia Podmore’s parents speak on the Saturday Morning show, while Dana Johannsen speaks to two women who gave key testimony [RNZ]
Not many sports do history well but netball’s Margret Henley has been doing the hard work in the archives and received a gong from the national body [Locker Room]
Video nasty
Lot of work for em around these parts.
Long read
Rich tech guys make some chat groups full of hubris, ego and over estimation of their own importance and end up radicalising each other in a very bleak way [Semafor]
Recommendation
Cracking series about people who live in amazing houses with messed up lives.