Sean Fitzpatrick: 'I'm in the metaverse and can't get out'
Sport Review #176
Hey! It’s your old mate Sean Fitzpatrick, family man and All Black legend!
But I’ve got a problem. I’m in the metaverse. And I can’t get out.
When you’re the ex-captain of a global elite sporting brand, you get stuff first. This bloody courier turns up and gives me a USB with the Metaverse on it. And a pair of gloves.
Now I was right into Second Life, but I had to admit. This was pretty swish.
Before you could say ‘trackies’ we were flowing down a river of hokey pokey. I was riding a Wattbike and Zinny was on a friesian.
Then the ‘95 team met up in a golden palace on a moonlit beach for a rave with Chewbaccas. Boys loved it.
There was a whole world to explore. You could fly over Epsom by night only everyone is a gopher, have a feast with Asterix and Obelix and also TinTin and talk cashflow with a pterodactyl.
It’s a magical place. But I want to go home now.
Love the internet. Love it. Candy Crush. eBaum’s World. Email.
Sure, I’m on Facebook. Who isn’t? Great to check out the content and catch up with the aunties and the boys and the gang in the ‘Freedom For Your Face and also Fishing’ group.
But I’ve got stuff to do. Deals. More couriers. Expert comments to make on rugby and things around the house.
I’ve been trying to take the gloves off but pigeons keep flying out. The goggles are stuck. The help key just makes a gnome turn up to laugh at me, it’s really high pitched. I can hear knocking on my room door but if I try and answer I just go down a Willy Wonka slide.
If you’re reading this, can you email me? I think that might reset things. Ta.
Thanks for reading - Richard
This week's best NZ sport content
Everyone needs to read Dylan Cleaver’s piece on Carl Hayman’s early onset dementia at 41, brought on by doing his job hard, and for a long time. Jack Cottrell has a referee’s perspective and runs through some of the lines used by the defence [The Bounce, Sportsfreak]
Aiden McLaughlin has the background on Yorkshire’s racism problem and cover up, alongside other incidents in the game, while Teuila Fuatai looks at Quinton de Kock’s refusal to take a knee and re-think and why it matters [Sportsfreak]
How NZer Harita Davies ran 18 hours a day for 51 days, covering 5000km around the same block in the Sri Chinmoy Self-Transcendence Race [Locker Room]
Alice Neville speaks to journo Micheal Donaldson on loving Titirangi, the golf club, and the pleasures of a regular round [The Spinoff]
Video nasty
Everyone loves it when the manager gets a go.
Long read
Two journalists start digging at the rumours around Jimmy Saville immediately after his death, but have to fight the BBC to be able to tell the story [Guardian]
Recommendation
The Britainology pod on the history of the Falklands war is an elite tier episode, have a listen [Trash Future]
Bring back the gif
When you change from daytime comfy pants into evening comfy pants.
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