Top ten tips for negotiating the 80s NZ Cricket Team Christmas party

Sport review #138

Being invited to the 80s NZ Cricket Team Christmas party is a great honour - you want to relax and enjoy the occasion, but not make a complete Warner of yourself. Prepare yourself by learning Sport Review’s top tips to be on your game. Have fun safely!

  • Don’t say “So if the 90s team was the Young Guns, does that make you guys the Old Guns?”

  • The recommended number of Chappell brothers to bring is one. You could do two at an absolute maximum, but you must include Ian

  • Don’t introduce Jeremy Coney and Richard Hadlee to sing Reunited on the karaoke without their express permission beforehand

  • Ewan Chatfield is not your ride home

  • Don’t play devil’s advocate for Australian umpires

  • Don’t say things like “Sheesh. That IPL money eh?”

  • Don’t suggest an improvised game of cricket using a bottle of scotch and Geoff Howarth’s car keys

  • Do stick to two drinks - best to leave early lest you find yourself arguing with a bouncer on Gary Troup’s behalf at 3am outside a central city nitespot

Thanks for reading - Richard

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